Name Awards

Ballmer’s in the bing – or will it go ka-ching!

Oh here we go again. Microsoft got Dr. Lu to come up with a great new search engine to provide smarter results than the usual crowd of suspects. But did Dr. Lu use some Chinese meaning to come up with the lifeless name Bing?

You know you have a problem right out of the gate when the CEO has to explain the name is not a joke to his own employees. And Microsoft doesn’t even believe it is enough of a proper noun to capitalize the logo, so it looks like the ending of a word – like the last syllable of stabbing.

You know you have more of a problem when you look in the Urban Dictionary and discover that this no-meaning word actually is street slang for Jail!

Now how much traffic will BingBong get? Wish these were my dogs. Still, I hope Bing isn’t a dog and goes ka-ching for Microsoft. Perhaps they will put their search engine where we can find it this time – and promote it accordingly. Otherwise, it is Do not Pass Go. Go Directly to Jail time.

PS Bing Crosby wasn’t even the famous old singer’s real name. Just a nickname for Harry Lillis Crosby.

Brain Burning Brand Names Boost Business

Today I tip my hat to Michael Fortin of SitePro News, the definitive source for news on website management and search engine marketing, in my humble opinion. Not only did he come up with this brainy title, his list of top 5 naming characteristics is fairly on the mark for anyone needing a quick refresher. Unfortunately, in an attempt to have 5 characteristics all starting with an S, he ends up contradicting himself (as most of us often do sooner or later in naming meetings).

Notice that item (1) is Suggestiveness. However, to satisfy item (3) Size, he uses Yahoo as an example. What does Yahoo suggest? According to Webster’s Dictionary, a slightly drunken cowboy!

Here is a more complete article I previously wrote about the top 10 characteristics of a good name that professionals can agree on. It continues to be relevant in most instances.

33Across is a rather puzzling name

I came across this name recently in a Business Week article on the power of friends and measuring social marketing. Makes you wonder what happens if 33Across merges with 45Down. Perhaps they will solve the SocialDNA tree!

More interestingly, what is that little splodge after their name?  A registered trademark sign?  Not a TM sign as it is one symbol. Reason I ask is that they have applied for a registered trademark on their SocialDNA service name, but never on their own company name. At least not in the USA, even though their HQ is in New York and their TQ (corny as they use it) is in Silicon Valley.

My guess is their logo designer jumped the gun on this one. He probably had too many social trademark DNA genes jumping in his jeans. Regardless, a cute and interesting name style that really cuts through the noise.

Mine That Bird or name that horse

While everyone else is sitting around captured by the shear performance of a horse starting from the rear (in the race and the odds) that surged forward to win the Kentucky Derby, I am sitting around wondering how he got that crazy name. I sure thought I heard the announcer say Name that Bird… but then I have naming on the brain. At least Name that Bird would be logical English!

What does Mine That Bird mean or signify, now that you stop to think about it? The phrase actually makes no sense, but a NY Times blog discussed it with the original owners and in the context of his pedigree is very logical. Apparently his mother is Mining My Own and his father is Birdstone.

Wouldn’t it be fun if we named startups after parts of their lineage? More importantly, do you know why racehorses have such weird and wonderful names, many of which are getting quite long? Never mind trademarks, domain names or common law, racehorses (like drugs) must have unique names so they can never be confused with each other. Not only so you don’t get two in the same race with the same name, but so that you can clearly track their pedigree.

As horse owners seek new names that have never been used before, they too run into the problem that all common English words have been used. One solution is to use two names, like we name people. Then you end up with Rachel Alexandra winning the Preakness, and you are not sure if that was the horse, the owner, or the trainer’s mistress!

A quick look at HowManyof Me.com (a fun little site) tells me there are only 2 Rachel Alexandra’s in the USA… so not too many ladies were teased on Monday for winning the Preakness!

But I hope horse owners continue to coin unique new names too. Not abstract ones like the big drug companies, but clever ones like Secretariat. After all, he still holds most of the track records 30 years later, despite all this new training and breeding and special diets for horses.

PS Stuck for a new name for your company or product and don’t want to call me for help? Read the Racing Form pages – though you probably need a sense of humor too.

Labou – my friends from the bayou

The movie Labou is being released on DVD today, much to the joy of active youngsters everywhere. But, parents, did you get the connection to the name in the title? Probably yes if you are from the south. Definitely yes if you are from Louisiana, and probably not otherwise.

My first thought was it was simply a coined character name like Babar or Baloo. Shows what I know. People from the Sacramento area (California) probably wondered why their favorite bakery La Bou was starring in a movie. (Not to be confused with its competitor La Boulangere another big chain named after literal French for The Bakery).

I think this simple example shows the power of having a geographically diverse creative team on any naming project. Those agencies with all their staff in NY or Miami or San Francisco would probably not have come up with such a cool name.

Meanwhile… forget ET phoning home. Go help Labou get out of the bayou and entertain the youngsters for days.

Bankrupt because they are below water

The econmy and changing need for paper products is affecting many large paper suppliers. But it is no wonder AbitibiBowater has been struggling ever since their consolidated merger that was going to make them stronger! After all, with a name like that, you need more than a marketing miracle.

Why do companies think they are new and improved after a merger if they drag around the old name baggage? I hope you don’t have shares in this big Canadian company. And don’t tell me the domain abitibibowater.ca was taken! It is no worse than AbitibiConsolidated.com.  Perhaps they just have wider business cards since they are in the paper and card business!

Concise and correct copy from Canada

Over the recent years I have encouraged a number of family and friends to start their own blogs. People I knew who could write – but people the world had not necessarily heard about – let alone hired for a writing gig. Then I finally got Kyra Dawson to blog – and she can’t stop. This is when you know you have hit a creative gusher!

Real artists just have to paint, real dancers have to dance, real singers have to sing, real namers have to name, and real writers have to write. It is in their soul and blood and must find release. The Brighter Scribe is one such person.

So if you are looking for a good copywriter, editor or blogger for your business, consider making a call to Canada where the air and writings are so clear – and the dollar goes further. The Scribe’s Desk may look a little messy – but elegant words flow fast and easy in this blog about books and movies. But Kyra can write well about most subjects, and is especially strong writing about books, sports, family, kids, pets, nature and health.

In addition, she has just done a great job editing my sister’s new book for children that will be out soon. Plus she is based in Vancouver, Canada, where so many Hollywood companies go to save a dollar – and more and more to employ the great Canadian resources available in British Columbia.

Now there is no need to deal with cultural and time zone issues to off-shore your writing projects, when you can near-shore them just north of the US border.

What a tasty name! Toasted too.

While wandering around the web today, chasing a word that turned out to be someone’s family name, I accidentally ended up in various ancestry sites, and the one that gave me the most information is called MyCinnamonToast.com. Ouch.. they are making me hungry. And it is not breakfast time.

Like some old toast recipes, it comes with a disappointment though. They are still claiming the registered trademark on the name, but it has expired. Double Ouch! Very sad.  Getting great names and registering trademarks is a lot of effort and marketing and legal time. Not renewing them is a trivial issue and small change from the piggy bank pays the toll. But not if you forget! They are only good initially for 6 years, but can be renewed many times over.

Let’s all take this as a call to check when our trademarks will expire. And who is the notice from the USPTO going to? At least think about it at breakfast once a year.

PS One of the great names in the early days of digital video editing was The Video Toaster from NewTek. Now they have gone all corporate and have common names like LightWave. Practical probably, but not nearly as much fun.

Bootstrappers Breakfast – Eating startup naming problems

There are a number of good and regular networking events in Silicon Valley, but none have as catchy a name as Sean Murphy’s Bootstrappers Breakfast series. Early this morning I was already pounding away – and dreaming of not having to cook my own boring eggs – when I remembered that next week I get to hang out with the Bootstrappers for an early restaurant meal.

And I will not forget.. because I am honored to be the guest speaker.. and will of course be addressing naming of products, services and companies for startups. Please join us.  Registration needed, as they sold out at their last breakfast. See www.Bootstrappers Breakfast.com.